SPEAKER_00 0:00

She always says systems are sexy. Yes, and I love that. You know what? You're right. They are. Welcome to Team Not Tired. We are so glad that you're here with us today. I'm Ashley Irwood.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

And I'm Shereen Croft.

SPEAKER_00 0:25

And we had such an incredible conversation in our last episode about the invisible load, the mental load that so many women carry. And so we wanted to continue the conversation today with another step in that direction called Delegation is Discipleship.

SPEAKER_01 0:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 0:44

Shireen, talk to us about how we can become better delegators.

SPEAKER_01 0:49

This is where I think I'm really strong at. Because I put in a lot of reps. And I would encourage you to go back to the last episode because this is in conjunct conjunction to that, because you can take kind of that mental load. And now we're going to take that ever-growing list, that mental list, and put it. We're going to chart it on paper. And now we're going to delegate it. We're going to really see what it means to put systems in place so that you can run at a sustainable pace. I love it. Yeah. Because I don't know about you actually, but there are times where I just get so overwhelmed. And technically I'm doing all the right things on paper. And nothing is really working out in my favor, or I hate the myth of I just need to work harder.

SPEAKER_00 1:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:49

Because it's such a lie. I I work incredibly hard and and still don't meet some of my goals. And I I know that I'm not alone in that.

SPEAKER_00 1:58

Yeah. Well, and the to-do list is never done.

SPEAKER_01 2:01

Right.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Ever.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

Right.

SPEAKER_00 2:03

And so you can you can be the hardest worker in the room, but it's never gonna get all done.

SPEAKER_01 2:10

Yeah, so make peace with it now. No one ever arrives. But I I want to say that this is the sustainable pace that we talk about. It requires structure.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

I like that. There's a a lady I follow, her name's Allie Worthington, and she says this all the time. She's such a great, just like business coach, spiritual coach, like good mentor voice. And she also she always says systems are sexy. Yeah, and I love that.

SPEAKER_01 2:43

I'm like, you know what? You're right. They are, and I think structure is sexy as well because because through those systems, you can get from carrying a mental load to putting in systems to really get yourself moving in a sustainable pace that you could crush your job, you could crush it at home, and and still love people at the end of the day. You can still love your family at the end of the day, you can still run at a sustainable pace, but that starts with choosing what matters and building support and boundaries and structure around it.

SPEAKER_00 3:24

Awesome. How do we do it?

SPEAKER_01 3:26

Teach me your ways. Well, I I think I think one of the things is like don't be frantic, like get it out of you, you know, brain dump. But I think one of the things that we can really get good at is making sure that our attention is on the right thing, sharing the load and boundaries. And what I I mean by that is what we're gonna talk about today, because delegation is key. You cannot do it all by yourself, you just can't. So make peace with that now. Even if you look at the other girl next to you or the woman, and she's like, she's nailing it, she's she's probably not doing it all.

SPEAKER_00 4:13

Absolutely, and she probably feels just like you. And she might have a team behind her that you don't know about.

SPEAKER_01 4:22

Correct, correct, and I think that I want to free us from wearing this badge of honor. I gotta do it all. I'm doing I'm superwoman, buying into this lie because at the end of the day, you are human, you have limitations, and I don't know about you, Ashley, but I kind of want to be a nice person at the end of the day. I don't want to be like an accomplished person. Like I want to be accomplished, I want my life to matter, and it's not the only thing we want to be known for.

SPEAKER_00 4:57

Correct. And that's not the end goal as women who are trying to live on mission. I think that's really good, Sharine. And it's a really good reminder. If if anybody's a recovering perfectionist like me, it's not even motivated sometimes by achievement. It's just that our to-do list and our lack of delegation comes from feeling like if we don't do it, then it's not going to be right. And that's that's something that I've had to learn to overcome along the way as well. And so I think this is going to be really helpful and beneficial for a lot of ladies.

SPEAKER_01 5:34

Well, and sometimes you're not managing tasks, you're managing that emotional energy that sometimes, and we've talked we've talked about this a little bit of like my 80% is still pretty high productivity. But if it costs me my emotional load of my peace, I I'm at the point in my career I don't want to do it. You know, and I think we even when we rest, we can't stop. And I don't I don't want that either. And so I think it's really important just to like sit with that because it can be heavy, but also it can be really freeing. I'm like, I don't have to do it all, I'm not required to do it all. Jesus never asked me, you know, to do it all. Right. And so we even see examples in the Bible, and I see this really in Exodus 18. And and right now I'm I'm reading through the Old Testament, which I personally love the Old Testament. I mean, there's a few chapter books in there we could skip, but I still love the concept of the old testament, and Moses is is great in Exodus 18, where his father-in-law is you know telling him he's leaving all these people, and people are waiting, and problems are stacking up left, right, and center. And Jethro basically says, like, what are you what are you doing?

SPEAKER_00 7:09

He says, This isn't good.

SPEAKER_01 7:10

You're gonna wear yourself out. This is not good, and he kind of helps give Moses that structure. He created structure, he shared the leadership, he appointed capable people. And in in Hebrews 12, one through two, it says, run with endurance, the race set before us. Endurance requires pace, shedding weight, fixing your eyes on Jesus, but not sprinting all the time. Yeah, and how do you do that? You have to be able to delegate, you have to be able to put structures in place because it's not weakness, delegation is is really discipleship, it's wisdom, and God cares so much about your endurance, he really does, and so I have some some practical tools for you because I am a systems girl. I love systems, I love structure.

SPEAKER_00 8:17

Well, I I love what you're saying about how delegation is discipleship, and and you use that illustration of Moses because just the whole idea of living a structured life, a life with systems, a life that involves delegation means that we're living life with other people.

SPEAKER_01 8:36

Correct.

SPEAKER_00 8:37

And I think we can't underestimate the value of how we've been designed to live in community and not live in isolation. And so I I love the conversation that we're having about sharing the load, about learning how to be good delegators, because that means that we're inviting people into our lives and ultimately like doing life with others because that means we're gonna be challenged, we're gonna be stretched, we're gonna be, you know, we're gonna be strengthened, but we're also gonna be able to have the opportunity to help others along the way as well.

SPEAKER_01 9:15

Yeah, and I think it gives you empathy too, because as a leader in helping other people leave, when I give someone a project and and I give them that ownership instead of, oh, hey, can you help me? I'm giving you ownership of this. And taking a step back and and kind of cheering them on and saying, yeah, I I can empathize now that this is hard to lead a team or to lead a project or to lead your home or to lead yourself. Yeah. Like there's a lot of empathy that that comes from that. But there's all also, and I'm a huge fan of this, is like get your reps in. This is a great place to not get it.

SPEAKER_00 11:10

So, how do how do we become better delegators, Shereen?

SPEAKER_02 11:15

So what you're doing. Correct. Got it.

SPEAKER_00 15:13

And I think that takes humility sometimes is to invite people into something and let them make it better than you even could. I think there's a lot of opportunity there. I have found, because we're talking a lot about a workplace environment, but even at home, I've been surprised sometimes at what my kids are capable of and their willingness to help when they feel like they're being invited into responsibility.

SPEAKER_01 15:43

Right. Ownership.

SPEAKER_00 15:44

Yeah. Giving them ownership to something that they wouldn't normally expect me to trust them with has been really fun to watch as they get older or even even when they were younger, you know, allowing them to go, hey, you're you're physically old enough to do your laundry. You're physically old enough to fold your clothes. So I'm not gonna do that for you anymore. But this is your responsibility now. And we're gonna buy you the, you know, colored laundry basket that you want. And you get to, you know, you get to decide where your clothes go in your drawer. And just giving someone ownership over things, sometimes I think that they'll surprise you and really step up to the challenge in in ways that they just didn't think they had permission to.

SPEAKER_02 16:32

Right.

SPEAKER_01 19:25

And not being a like being afraid that opportunity is not gonna come your way.

SPEAKER_00 19:29

Yeah. That's good. I I think that takes a level of self-awareness and humility, but also even just working into our rhythms of constant evaluation of going, well, I've said yes to something, but that doesn't mean I have to that that yes is forever. Like this might be something that I need to say no to or transition out of for a season. And I found that a lot with especially early motherhood, where there were things that I loved doing, there were things that I could do, there were things that I was really good at, but I had to put pause, put those on pause for a season where my attention had to go to my children, like you're talking about, the things that only I can do. And then the Lord has been really gracious to bring other opportunities back in the right time when I had more capacity to do them well.

SPEAKER_02 20:28

Yeah, I'm not gonna do it. You gotta delegate.

SPEAKER_00 22:39

You have to multiply yourself. And I I love that, Shireen. I think this is a really practical, helpful series that we've done the last two episodes. And I can't, I just can't help but think about Jesus' example of, you know, you you talked about how delegation truly is discipleship. And I just want to encourage ladies listening that we have the opportunity to, like you said, multiply ourselves, but also invest in other people when we invite them into our lives and we invite them to invite people, whether it be a spouse, a friend, a coworker, you know, a volunteer, to share, to share the load, to share responsibility. I think about the miracle of feeding the 5,000 and how Jesus, there was no mistake that he was pouring out his life on display and sharing the work of ministry with 12 other men. He could, he did the miracle of multiplying the food, but the disciples shared in the work of distributing the food. And there's something really powerful when we're trying to live on mission to do it with other people, inviting them in in the same way that we want to be women who want to help others. We have to be willing to ask for help and accept help from others as well. And so I hope that our listeners today will feel encouraged by this. I hope that you feel equipped to begin becoming a really good delegator. And we want to remind you that naming your invisible load, learning how to invite others into your life is such an important part of running at a sustainable pace. So we hope that you've enjoyed today's episode. If it was helpful, would you please share it? Send us a review and do all, yeah, do all the things. But not all the things.